wasn't supposed to end like this.
who the hell am I kidding? You know, as a longtime fan of pro football
in Houston, I've become something of a connoisseur of this sort
of thing. Not just bad football, not just disappointing losses,
but historically bad football and heart-stabbingly disappointing
Sage Rosenfels, welcome to the personal hell that is the tortured
psyche of the Houston pro football fan. We're fresh out of chairs,
but there is still some standing room in the back. And, well, thanks
to you, we're now considering a whole new wing devoted to the suckage
that you displayed on Sunday afternoon in a 31-27 loss to the Colts,
what with your three unforgivable turnovers, all coming within a
span of the final four minutes of a game.
really, it wasn't supposed to end like this. In their home opener,
about a month delayed due to the effects of Hurricane Ike, the Texans
should have been able to capitalize on an unusually out of sorts
Colts team and earn their first victory of the season, riding a
wave of feel-good karma and put-upon league sympathy (is it just
me, or is it funny how Commissioner Roger Goodell only shows up
when he gets a photo op in front of an over-sized check?).
was all going so smoothly, too. The Texans overcame a 10-0 first
quarter deficit to respond with 27 unanswered points. It was a surge
directed by Rosenfels, one in which he parlayed a 97-yard rushing
performance by Steve Slaton and found Andre Johnson early and often,
his star receiver gaining more than 100 yards and a score.
it was a lead fortified by a legitimate defensive effort, too. Mario
Williams collected a pair of sacks and was an all-around terror
for most of the game. Heck, even beleaguered players like Jacques
Reeves and Zac Diles turned in their best performances of the season.
second lost fumble ultimately did him in, but it was the entire
final four minutes of the game that really sunk the Texans.
a 27-10 lead midway through the fourth quarter, the Texans blinked,
going a wee bit soft on defense. To their credit, they still forced
the Colts into a fourth down situation, which they converted for
seven points. No worries though, as David Anderson calmly recovered
the onsides kick with four minutes to play.
the ensuing drive, Rosenfels bootlegged to his left, leapt with
a careless hold on the football and fumbled mid-air before watching
the Colts' Gary Brackett return the miscue for an anus-puckering
touchdown to cut the lead to 27-24.
Rosenfels proved unable to shake off his mistake. With the ball
again deep in his own territory, Rosenfels scrambled to his left,
again with a careless grasp of the football. PUCKER,
PUCKER, PUCKER. Colts DE Robert Mathis slapped the ball free,
giving way to the visiting offense to score the go-ahead touchdown.
by four still with just under two minutes to play, Rosenfels had
one more opportunity to seal his failure for generations to come.
Attempting a comeback, he misread Johnson's route and threw a game-killing
had three game balls to give away today, but Rosenfels found a way
to give them all away for me.
Rosenfels' three turnovers are an easy pick here.
ought to be noted though that the defense has become appallingly
futile on fourth down conversions. After allowing 2/2 conversions
last week, the Texans allowed the Colts to convert all three of
their fourth down attempts on Sunday.
third conversion, a seven-yard touchdown pass from Peyton Manning
late in the fourth quarter, shrunk the team's lead to ten points
and gave just the teensiest breath of life into the Colts, which
Rosenfels then completed with a thorough CPR effort all his own.
Copyright 2008 ...In
the Bullseye is in no way affiliated with or
endorsed by the actual Houston Texans franchise. It's a non-commercial
website for the enjoyment of football fans and is not intended for
any other purpose. For legitimate content on the team, its operations
and its actions, please visit