Official Texans vs. Rams Game Thread, 10/31/2021
 

The 1-6 Houston Texans host the 6-1 Los Angeles Rams this Sunday in an early game. The Texans are coming off a 31-5 road loss to the Arizona Cardinals while the Rams are coming off a 28-19 home win over the Detroit Lions.

Rams QB Matthew Stafford is having a very good year (313 yds/game, 19 TD, 4 INT, 116.7 rating) and in the league MVP conversation. His top RB is Darrell Henderson Jr. (417 yds, 4.3 avg.) and favorite receiver is Cooper Kupp (56/809 yds, 14.4 avg.).

The Texans seem to have issues everywhere. Disorganized, under-talented, rudderless. The Rams should have no problem.

Rams 27, Texans 5

(Texans become the 1st NFL team to score 5 pts. two weeks in a row.)

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TV = FOX (channel 26 local), noon CST, Sunday, October 31, 2021

Announcers = Chris Myers, Daryl Johnston

The line = Rams by 14½ to 15½

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Other Sunday viewing in the Houston area:

FOX (late) = Tampa Bay @ New Orleans, Joe Davis, Troy Aikman

CBS (late) = New England @ LA Chargers, Ian Eagle, Charles Davis

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Prime time:

TNF = Green Bay @ Arizona (FOX/NFLN)

SNF = Dallas @ Minnesota (NBC)

MNF = NY Giants @ Kansas City (ESPN)

You're always bugging me to make predictions, well, here's a prediction. I predict that if the Rams have the lead at halftime, they'll win.

Here's another one. I'll take the Rams and whatever the spread is at kickoff, which could be 20 or more.

Picking games where the spread is more than two touchdowns is brutal. Just brutal. And the Texans are home dogs in this, too. There should never be spreads this large in the NFL, especially when it's the home team taking it in the nads.

Typically I love spots where there's a home dog. But not this one. Maybe I'll go watch that new Wes Anderson movie tomorrow afternoon instead.

Rams 33, Texans 13

Rams take the opening kickoff and march on down the field. Stafford hits Henderson for a 3 yard TD pass.

Rams 7, Texans 0

9:32 left in the 1st qtr.

16.5 at kickoff. Free money.

Matt Gay adds a 27 yard FG for the Rams.

Rams 10, Texans 0

8:51 left in the half.

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First downs: Rams 12, Texans 1

Davis Mills throws an INT giving the Rams a short field.

Stafford hits Woods for a 2 yard TD pass.

Rams 17, Texans 0

6:09 left in the half.

That’s a joke of a penalty. And you don’t even see anyone on our team or staff get angry. We just accept it because we are t trying to win and we have no chance regardless of the outcome of that call. Just zero investment from our whole franchise.

And halfway through the second quarter the Rams are covering the largest spread in the league this week.

So for all you dumbasses celebrating the team's trading Ingram for a pick that will be used on a guy who won't make the team, what you may not be taking into account is that moves like that demoralize the team. No, this is nothing new, the team's giving away useful to great players for pennies on the dollar if that. But at some point, and it seems clear that we've arrived at that point, it will result in everyone's just giving up.

And as satisfying as it will be for me to watch the franchise implode and disgrace be brought upon the despicable McNair family and the team hopefully lose its fan base and be forced to move to St Louis or wherever, in the mean time you goons should recognize that priority number one for the team right now is trying to figure out if Mills can play, and if you keep removing usable skill players for absolutely no reason, that is going to retard his development and it will be harder and harder to get a read on what you have at that position. But sure, enjoy that seventh round pick. Maybe they'll really splash out with it, draft a left footed punter or something, give us something to look forward to three years from now.

You’re an idiot chuck. You’re tilting at windmills here. There isn’t one person on this site (out of the 5 of us) who thinks this team is doing a good job. You’re just setting us up as strawmen to rant against. You pretend you’re smart for knowing this team is bad. Everyone knows that. You aren’t a voice in the desert speaking truth to power. You’re just a whining douche who insists on insulting people who aren’t disagreeing with you.

And here's another thing, I've thought about this a lot and have gone back on my initial concurrence with the idea that the Texans aren't trying to win. I think they are trying to win. This is just what trying to win from a franchise led by Cal McNair, Jack Easterby and Nick Caserio looks like. I sincerely believe that. It seems glaringly obvious that these people are deeply delusional, delusional enough to believe that they can field a winning team by assembling a group of players who hew to their perverted ideas of character and so on.

Henderson runs it in for a 1 yard TD.

Rams 24, Texans 0

30 seconds left in the half.

You're the one defending the team, dude. Tell me more about idiocy. Go on.

This is what I mean. You’re more delusional than your man Easterby. You both don’t allow reality to affect what you see. You’re two peas in a pod. You just have different delusions.

Can I get a "hail mary"?

No. Texans hit Nico Collins with 2 seconds left in the half to set up a missed 45 yard FG by Fairbairn.

Remains:

Rams 24, Texans 0

Halftime.

So we've got guys out here mocking the idea that it's probably not too great to give away your useful skill players, giving the team cover for their brutal incompetence by declaring Hey they're not even trying to win anyway and then running around talking about how delusional everyone else is. Finally I get to cash in on some of that entertainment Keith has been promising.

Can you read the statement below and tell me what you see?

The Texans are a pathetic franchise with the worst owner in pro sports.

Do you read that and see me saying Cal McNair is great? I'm curious how far your delusions go? Just how badly do you need to believe the rest of us are goons who support the texans?

About halfway to the 3rd qtr., Stafford hits Kupp for an 11 yard TD pass.

Rams 31, Texans 0

Now, 5:54 left in the 3rd qtr.

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Whelp, not a totally wasted day. I finished the Sunday Sudoku and got some sun tea going with water from new water dispenser. Tonight the Astros have a chance to make the day more miserable....

Ooof, Woods takes the flip and scoots around the end for a 16 yard rushing TD.

Rams 38, Texans 0

2 seconds left in the 3rd qtr.

Wait, you wrote that text that you have italicized? That's some pretty impressive lucidity. I bet the thorazine had just kicked in.

Burkhead runs one in for the Texans. 1 yard.

Rams 38, Texans 7

8:08 left in the game.

Texans go deep for the first time in about 3 games and Mills hits Cooks for a 45 yard TD pass.

Rams 38, Texans 14

5 minutes left in the game.

Onside kick works for the Texans and they march on down for a 9 yard TD pass to Brevin Jordan.

Mills keeps for the 2 pt conversion.

Rams 38, Texans 22

2:35 left in the game

Well, they are learning how to rack up the garbage time points......

Texans almost add another score but run short of time.

Final score:

Rams 38, Texans 22

Free money for your bookie, lol.

That's what they call a "bad beat" in the biz, chuckster.....

Today's thread delivered plenty of enterainment.

Hey Arky you know man I figure that shit-azz Chuckster went to that snotty Rushmore school with Anderson himself.

And you are wrong. I am a proud product of HISD and a supporter of public eduction in general.

Early line has the Dolphins as 7 pt favorites over the Texans next Sunday (at Miami).